Short Girl Problems

While watching the new Stars Wars movie Rogue One at the cinema yesterday I developed a really bad neck, shoulder, and upper body ache. It took a good hour or so of stretching, massaging, and pain meds to ease the ache enough to go to sleep. The culprit of my ache was the theater seat, which was designed for an average-height person. At 4’11 and 3/4 inches I am not an average height person. 

The cushioning made for neck support hit me at the top of my head, making my neck and shoulders hunch forward. Typical chairs are extremely uncomfortable for short girls like me.

This is just one of many #shortgirlproblems. In addition:

My feet can’t touch the ground:

Wheee! Look at me wee wee.

I need back support!

The 5′ deep end goes over my head.

Bobbing up and down.

My legs are too short for even “petite” pants:

I’m forever rolling up my pants. I’ve become too lazy to hem.

As for bicycling:

This hurts like a mother plucker.

My feet can’t touch the pedals in a car unless I’m this close:

This isn’t exactly safe but it’s what I have to do to drive!

Forget trying to see anything up high:

I need to climb to reach anything!

I’ve actually done this! It’s highly frown upon by store clerks.

I really don’t mind climbing – it can be quite fun.

I’ve almost gotten stuck doing this!

It’s hard to keep up:

When I hug I often get chests and boobies in my face:

This is what it’s like to kiss me:

Until recently I looked like a child and often got treated as such:

People like to comment on my height which annoys the shit out of me:

However there are some advantages to bring short-statured:

I can fit into small spaces:

People naturally have affection for me because they think I’m cute:

I never hit my head on things:

I’m like a feisty little ninja:

I will forever look younger than my age. (Yes, it’s also a plus).

Okay, maybe not THIS young!

The biggest advantage?

I can play on the playground!