In my last post, I stated if I didn’t write a cover letter for a job application then I’d write a post to explain why.

The truth is I don’t believe anything will ever work out, which I also wrote in my last post. When I decided to just write the cover letter anyway, my brain just couldn’t put the words together. Why should anyone hire me? I really don’t know. I can’t seem to find a way to get past this block.

I didn’t leave the house yesterday as a result, and I was thinking I wasn’t going to out today as well when I realized we were out of anything to drink (our well water tastes blech and we had no more bottled water, or soda, or anything). So I gathered my daughter and we went to the gas station and bought bottled water, ice, and masks. We dropped off our supplies at home and then went to the dollar store to pick up some food, pack of playing cards (for our nightly family time), and items my kids needed for school.

I wasn’t going to go out again a third time, but my daughter practically begged me to go rollerblading. She hates being out in the sun so we went at sunset and she rollerbladed while I walk/jogged (my leg didn’t cramp this time!)

Here are some pics from our adventure:

K Skating

My daughter rollerblading


Me looking like Slenderman

Sunset Tree

Some random tree I thought was cool

Sunset Fields

Sun setting over the baseball fields

I hope to be able to seriously look for work soon and work through the panic that piles on top of me whenever I start. Will update tomorrow.

Thanks for reading, friends.

โค๏ธ๐Ÿงก๐Ÿ’›๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’œ, Q

9 thoughts on “Sunset

  1. I sympathize. Till I was laid off 3yrs ago, I had no problem getting jobs. Now, even when I ace an interview I get ghosted. And I’m not talking once or twice… more like 20+ times… totally ghosted.

    I only write a cover letter if I feel a need to explain how my skills indirectly fulfill requirements. Most online submissions are now handled by computers which scan, fill out application fields, and only spit out highly qualified candidates to the hiring peeps. The problem with that is, in my experience, no 2 automated systems parse files the same and in the rare instance the sorted dara is shown to me, it is virtually always wrong… meaning my resume is probably rejected 90% of the time.

    I strongly recommend working with temp agencies or recruiters. But don’t ever bother to return a call/email to Indian names/accents. The vast majority of those are H1 Visa employees from India who are forced to work in recruiting call centers when they’re between gigs. They don’t know what they’re doing and have no inside contact with the hiring companies… they’re literally using Monster & Indeed, just like you are.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so sorry you can relate to this experience, Leenda! It feels so horrible to be ghosted, doesn’t it?

      That’s a great suggestion about working with temp agencies and recruiters. I was working with Vocational Rehab (my bipolar disorder counts as a disability) but it’s been 3 months and they haven’t been able to come up with any job leads for me (how frustrating).

      I appreciate your advice and I’ll only write a brief cover letter if it’s situation where it is likely to be read. I don’t need to waste the effort if it’s not going to produce anything useful.


      1. I have severely f-ed up knees which make me unable to stand for more than a few minutes. Insurance has denied treatment and docs won’t do whatever it takes to list me as disabled (seems to be a lot of liability??? I dunno). So now I’m disabled but can’t get it recognized and also can’t do most entry/get by jobs. At the same time, I can’t make the commute to the well paying jobs I trained for (driving aggravates the knees plus it now takes 3hrs to go 30 miles). I feel stuck!!


          1. I was sooooo close to a work from home job just before the pandemic hit! With Cali’s governor declaring that C19 treatment will be paid by worker’s comp (employers) instead of insurance, there’s little chance for me to get work now.


          2. Damn. I didn’t know California changed it to Worker’s Comp. I’m assuming that means that employers are less likely to hire if they think they’ll have to pay for C19 treatment?


  2. Quix, being unemployed is so demoralizing and difficult…if people haven’t dealt with it, they can’t understand just how it saps you of all hope. I have so many good things going for me, but since becoming disabled I’ve been unemployed for the better part of 12 years. Never give up…but do try to to protect yourself emotionally from all the rejection. This is admittedly a difficult thing to accomplish. Just keep swimming!


    1. It really is. And I’ve been unemployed for so many years (total) over the course of my working years. It looks really bad on resumes when there are so many gaps. It’s now been 14 months since my last long term job (I can’t put my most recent job on my resume as I only worked there for 2 weeks and that looks REALLY bad). I have the excuse of being in school for 2 semesters in the last year, but it still looks bad that I haven’t worked. Everytime I try to find a job it ends up taking me nearly a year (or more).

      People say I’m being picky but I’m just trying to find work that I can actually do. I try to comfort myself by looking at the percentage of those with my disorder (bipolar) who are unemployed or underemployed (it’s most of us). I read somewhere that those with bipolar disorder with college degrees (like me) end up earning income about the same as someone with just a high school diploma. That’s depressing, but I’ve found it to be true. The Vocational Rehab place isn’t helping me AT ALL (they haven’t contacted me about any job leads) and it’s been several months. Sigh.

      Liked by 1 person

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About Quixie

Hi! I go by "Quixie." Quixie is a shortened version of "quixotic," which means: "exceedingly idealistic; unrealistic and impractical." It's how I described my evangelical Christian faith when I started blogging 5 years ago. Now I'm an agnostic atheist who is trying to find a balance between idealism and reality. I write primarily about my mental health journey (I have bipolar disorder), and I also discuss my deconversion, mindfulness, exercise, music, reading, and other cultural topics.