My vision while floating

I supposed it wasn’t a “vision,” per se, more like a visualization of peace.

I floated in a sensory deprivation tank full of Epsom salt for the umpteenth time the other day. The reason why I went was that I got hit –hard–at the skating rink and I was still sore, days later. I figured the float spa therapy would help my body ache less, and it worked.

Also, I realized when I got in the tank and didn’t have access to my phone I felt anxious. I realized how much anxiety I’d been in and how much I use my phone to distract me from my anxiety. I realized I have been experiencing anxiety about basic things, such as taking out the trash, or over things you’d think I’d be excited about, such as skating with my friends.

I felt unsettled for the first 30 minutes (? you have no concept of time in the tank) and then I started thinking about what it was that would make me feel at peace. And what came to me was being in a tidy apartment surrounded by lots of plants.

I realized that this made me feel more relaxed than anything I could think of so I ordered some plants online (non-toxic to pets, of course) and today started cleaning my apartment.

I’ve already gotten my large Money Tree, and have started growing some cat grass for Lucy to chew on, though she will probably chew on my other plants –let’s be real– and am waiting for a fern. I also plan on getting some plants outdoors so I can eventually have some friends over and hang out on the patio with them.

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About Quixie

Hi! I go by "Quixie." Quixie is a shortened version of "quixotic," which means: "exceedingly idealistic; unrealistic and impractical." It's how I described my evangelical Christian faith when I started blogging 7 years ago. Now I'm an agnostic atheist who is trying to find a balance between idealism and reality. I write about my mental health journey with bipolar disorder, my loss of faith (deconversion), parenting teens, reading, exercise/health, work-life, and my marriage separation/divorce.