Cute, cute, cute!

I had a good time with my mom today. Her injured foot is causing her less pain and I realized the pain had been causing her unpleasant attitude. But now that she’s feeling quite a bit better the last couple days she and I have gotten along pretty well.

Today I went along with her to a skin care place where she had previously booked an appointment for a facial and eyebrow something or other (I don’t understand what all these things are). I sat in the lobby reading The Happiness Trap. My therapist loaned me the book and wanted me to read it. It covers the core concepts of everything I’ve been learning the last couple of years that I’ve been working with her.

My mom’s appointment took a couple hours (why does it take that long?) but I enjoyed the quiet in the beautiful spa-like environment, reading the book. It was warm and cozy.

Did I mention it was 5 degrees outside today (-15 degrees Celsius)? It’s coooooold. But it wasn’t painfully cold because I bundled up really well with weather-appropriate clothing and didn’t stay outside for longer than 5 minutes at a time. I had planned on going outside with wet hair and taking a pic of it crystalized, but decided against that. Maybe when it’s back up in the 30s again I’ll try.

After the spa thing my mom and I went to a series of shops to browse. My mom bought me a gift:

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It was a rainbow colored bracelet, with a portion of the proceeds going to the Matthew Shepard Foundation. As much as possible I try to contribute to organizations and charities that help LGBTQIA folks, like The Trevor Project. I feel a strong responsibility to do so because my former beliefs were harmful to this community. Even if I was never outwardly unkind, in my heart I was a bigot and I supported people who were bigots, and didn’t stand up for others. That’s really shitty and it’s important to me to maybe help reverse some of that.

Plus, this bracelet is so freakin pretty. I love it so much. Actually, I didn’t know some of the proceeds went to the Matthew Shepard Foundation when I told my mom I wanted it, so it’s a bonus.

I also found this white peacock that I fell in love with and hinted very strongly to my mom she should make a secret spontaneous buy for me. I mean, I don’t expect anything but she’s always asking what I want. So there you go.

Here he is. Isn’t he beautiful?

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You are probably thinking it’s silly and not beautiful, but we all have our own things that bring us delight.

I also found some really amazing cards by Bonair Daydreams. Just stunning photography and genuine heart-felt quotes. I think most cards are cliche and boring, but I found myself reading these cards for over 10 minutes and could have done so for far longer had my mom not wanted to leave the store. Here’s one example. Awww.

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We visited some other shops and I oohed and aahed at the locally made products. I told my mom if ever I were wealthy I would find a way to support local artists and I’d buy everything local and just appreciate the beautiful that my neighbors had made and contributed to the community. This and travelling to see people I care about are about the only reasons I would care to have more $ than is necessary to survive. I’m not really into accumulating things. Well, books. I’d love to collect a whole room of books.

Speaking of books, we went to a bookstore with the most amazing selection of books but with an extremely high price tag. I’m currently reading Moby Dick on an app on my phone and I saw a beautifully illustrated version that seemed more appealing than my app. I like art and I like holding books in my hands. That was cool. It was worth the expense as it was so well done but I didn’t have the money.

We went out to eat and my mom complained that the waitress didn’t bring her a plate to set her tea bag on, nor cream even though she asked for it. I don’t often think of my mom as old, but it’s an old thing to do. So I laughed at her and fortunately she was in the mood to be able to laugh at herself.

I showed my mom all she had to do was make eye contact with the waitress, put her hand up and ask again, Oh – can you please bring us some cream and an extra plate? Thank you. and smile. Sometimes that doesn’t work if you can’t make eye contact but in this case it worked. I used to be the kind that would stew but really I’d rather enjoy time with my mom over being annoyed with a waitress.

I looked into my mom’s eyes with tears of affection and told her how much it meant to me that I could spend quality time with her today. Despite visiting with her for over a week now we haven’t had that. I only took my phone out to take pictures. Most of the time I was just fully present with her. It was nice.

We also went to a thrift shop and I took some pics of the things I found interesting.

This biker made out of nuts and bolts. How cool is he?

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This fun and flashy skating costume:

This dress that I practically drooled over but that is too small and expensive for me:

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These ice skates at a really reasonable price. I’ve only ice skated four times in my life and I want to go again. I just need to lose a little bit more weight and build up my strength in my ankles and shins again. And find someone to go ice skating with. My mom told me that when the nearby lake freezes everyone goes ice skating on it and she saw the interest in my eyes and said, You really are a winter girl.

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I saw this vinyl with a cute girl on the cover that reminded me that I may also be into girls in addition to guys:

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And it made me laugh that 50 Cent has a vinyl record for some reason. I used to listen to his music in college when I was being a horrible Christian (just look up the lyrics):

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This next one made me laugh so hard:

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And this little lady is so pretty. I wanted to take her home:

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Look at these two making kissies at each other. So cute:

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I think everything I like is cute. It’s like I have no other adjectives. I need to work on that.

Overall my day was great. How was yours?

4 thoughts on “Cute, cute, cute!

  1. This is going to sound weird, but today was great because I got a call from my anesthesiologist!

    I had a bad reaction to a drug when I had my gallbladder out last month. I had been trying to reach somebody to get some questions answered, and it had taken six weeks for me to be able to find the right person to talk to and get a message to them that I needed to talk. Today I got all my questions answered, got my medic-alert bracelet ordered, and I am feeling much, much better about this. Odd what can really make your day.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m so glad you got to spend some good, quality time with your mom. Parental relationships can be so complicated, but one must appreciate every moment of happiness and connectedness.

    I use to despise the frigid winters here in MN, but these last couple of years I’ve begun to notice the amazing beauty of winter. I parked a recliner right in front of our big window and every day spend some time there assessing the landscape. The winter sky is especially gorgeous, all pastel and icy-hued. I don’t think I ever looked at the winter sky with “seeing” eyes before, and I find that somewhat sad. My 8 year old son, who likes to park himself in front of video games at every available moment, would never take a minute to look at the sky. Perhaps one has to live a long time to appreciate what is right in front of us.

    I adore the stuffed peacock and hope he becomes yours! I’m a huge fan of stuffed animals and have a few to keep me company. Lots of people thinks this makes me weird, but I agree with you that holding onto some childhood joy is essential to combating depression and loneliness.

    I’ve identified as bisexual since the age of 10…of course being raised in fundamentalist religion I was able to tell no one, and got a wonderful dose of self hate to boot. Thankfully I was able to allow myself some experiences when I was away at college, though I suffered massive guilt and had to actively hide everything from my family and friends when I went back home. I’m married to a man now so it’s something of a moot point, but I resent the fact that it’ still not accepted in 2019. I’ve considered coming out to my family as bi (my husband has known since our first date), but when I came out as an atheist it blew their world apart and they’re still furious about it 5 years later. LOL…I don’t think more revelations are needed at this point. I hope you will feel the freedom to explore all avenues open to you now that you’ve escaped the cult!

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    1. I know! Isn’t that peacock so cute! I hope I get him. I’m going to keep hinting at my mom. She tends to buy me things I have little interest in. I appreciate the gesture but I think from her perspective a goofy looking stuffed animal peacock is probably not high on her list of things that someone would want. She thinks my 11 year old son is odd because he loves stuffed animals and has the same reaction as me, “OMG- it’s soooo cute. Awwww,” he says. He’s a sensitive kid like me.

      Yeah – Minnesota is gorgeous! My mom’s dad is from Wisconsin and my mom lived in Wisconsin and Minnesota growing up. She tried to escape the extreme cold, but too bad for her she fell in love and ended up moving to New England to be with my step-dad. Ha ha. Since I arrived here in NH it’s been in the teens and single digits. I keep talking about things that I’m appreciating about the cold. Like, I saw that the local pond is frozen over. It made me happy to think about stepping on the frozen pond one it’s safe. Also, on my long trek to my parents’ mailbox I noticed tracks in the snow from a goggle of 30 wild turkeys, which was really exciting to me. Lol. Life is hard so it’s good to enjoy the moments we can.

      I was hesitant to bringing up the attraction to woman thing because I don’t currently identify as bisexual, though that’s probably closer to the truth than straight. I’m glad you figured it out so young but so sad that you felt so much shame and that you couldn’t, and still can’t come out to people in your life.

      I’d be interested in discussing this with you further via email. I don’t remember your email address so if you are interested in a chat you can send me an email at quixie2016@gmail.com And if not you can ignore 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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About Quixie

Hi! I go by "Quixie." Quixie is a shortened version of "quixotic," which means: "exceedingly idealistic; unrealistic and impractical." It's how I described my evangelical Christian faith when I started blogging 7 years ago. Now I'm an agnostic atheist who is trying to find a balance between idealism and reality. I write about my mental health journey with bipolar disorder, my loss of faith (deconversion), parenting teens, reading, exercise/health, work-life, and my marriage separation/divorce.